I often work with clients on how to achieve a kind of success in life that resonates deeply with their soul. Most of us can identify when we were ‘doing’ life rather than engaging in life. ‘Doing’ life leads to a sense of disconnection, dissatisfaction and ultimately incredible underperformance. Engaging in life leads to creation of the impossible, deep relationships and soul connection and fulfilment beyond your wildest dreams.
Most people I work with are used to achieving relatively big in the world. Probably others point at them and think they are pretty marvellous – high income, family, recognition in the workplace etc. One thing often links them though – a sense something has been missing. That maybe they’ve been pushing hard in their world, but that somehow they are actually missing connecting to their true potential. It’s what I call the Soulless Success Problem. It the perfect strategy for the prevention of a great life. The problem with it is that if the generator of the success isn’t living what Brene Brown calls a wholehearted life, potential really isn’t being fulfilled. It’s like living in the most beautiful mansion in the most beautiful place in the world – but only being allowed to reside in a small box in the garage.
So how to get out of that experience and on to a more incredible life? It’s pretty simple:
Connection. To yourself, to others and to your deepest desires.
It’s what I work most with my clients around.
Actually, the first thing is awareness and connecting to a desire to go deeper into life., then comes learning how you disconnect, what makes you open and close and what makes you retract. Then comes true, authentic, deep connection. What you can create from THAT place of discovery is incredible.
It’s been a personal interest of mine too. I found myself achieving well in the world in spite of myself – in spite of being strongly disconnected in may ways from my own experiences and in protection from life and others. Others were impressed but I had such a deep sense that more was possible for me if only I could let go of the ways I held back. So I did little and big research projects, went to workshops where I was the small fish in the room, had the therapy, engaged coachy friends and colleagues, listened more deeply to others and myself, admitted I didn’t always have all the answers, worked ar letting go of old numbing out behaviours, and became an intensity junkie whist I connected as often as I could to myself, to life, to experiences and to others.
It has been the biggest learning curve possible.What I learnt from all that was incredibly useful. What I learnt was that disconnection stops the flow of energy. It actually halts your potential and creates fixed patterns of behaviour. It means you continually undermine your experience of life and what you can create in the world.
What magic awaits you?
Imagine now standing in the shallows of the ocean. As you stand there the waves are coming in and out towards the shore, some big, some small, but all powerful. In this situation we have two options: stand straight, with your feet on the ocean floor below and be battered by the elements, or take your feet off, connect with the sensations and trust that you will float, be carried and be supported. What happens when you do that is you are carried in the most beautiful way. If you take time to connect with what is around you you are looked after. The energy of nature flows with you not against you. This is connection.
To do this takes courage. It takes stretch, it takes experiencing. Take a moment to be with yourself and notice where you are at right now. If you were to increase connection to yourself what would you be experiencing in this moment? What would it sound like? What sensations would you feel more of in your body. If you were to turn on to yourself even more than you are right now, how would you experience that? Notice the sensations moving in your body as you allow that connection to yourself to radiate out. Take your feet off the ocean floor, allow yourself to flow freely, see if you can allow yourself to be carried to wherever you need to go in this moment that means you can find a deeper connection with yourself and the world around you.
What would that mean for your life? Notice what it is that occurs to you about your own life and how you could use deeper connection and openness to to facilitate new possibilities,
Find the courage for connection. Have the conversation with yourself, with others, be brave, be daring, feel the edges, get out there, listen to your truth, speak your truth, surrender, connect from your heart, kiss deeply, make love wildly, feel passion, explore. There is nothing to be found in hiding yourself, in cutting off, in disconnecting. The world needs your passion, your energy. Stop being selfish. Share it!
And if you’d like to enter into a conversation about how I can help just drop me a line here.